tardis-mind-palace:

ruthyless:

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of vampires when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse the vampires and they would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

Your brother is the best

(via pofato)

pansoph:

for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’

(via touchmyostrich)

(via dutchster)

bloodyoathmate:

Unfollowing a lot of blogs and then looking at your dash

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(via dutchster)

(via yourpubes)

alexmusicstone:

joshhargadonasaurus:

ogfoodnun:

the best video

WHAT HAPPENED TO HER AFTER

THAT ONE KID JUST STARTS EATING THE CAKE

(via thedailylaughs)

i-am-mishafuckingcollins:

overlordjake:

faggotarian:

verysiriuspotterhead:

caskettcase:

i work at home depot and yesterday i decided to pick up some possible paint colors for future living arrangements and loved this swatch

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especially this one

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which once you crop it comes out to be this color online

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and i kept wondering…where have i seen that color before when it dawned on me.

you can never truly leave

we really are deep royals

we really are deeproyals

BUT I THOUGHT WE WOULD NEVER BE ROYALS

(via yourpubes)